Before I was graced with a moment of clarity that led me to Alcoholics Anonymous, I felt entitled to everything I received. After all I battled the world day in and day out for these few scraps of comfort. Mostly I resented life for not giving me more. Over time these "old ideas" slowly dissolved by continuing to do the things that were suggested to me in my first week. A grateful attitude is flowering.
I try to remember that everything I put out into the universe returns to me in one way or another. Every thought is a prayer. When I have grateful thought, energized by grateful feelings, abundance flows in my life. Too often I overlook the many small blessings each day brings. I often wonder how good my life would get if I practiced an attitude of gratitude in all my affairs.
My sponsor taught me that gratitude is a verb. It's not just how I feel, it's what I do. If I feel grateful for my health, I take good care of my body. If I feel grateful for my job, I find a way to do it better. If I feel grateful for my recovery, I show it by being of service. Gratitude is action.
I'm grateful to be an alcoholic. I've come a long way from my dirty, darkened apartment, overflowing ashtray and bottle of red wine at 11:00 in the morning. Today most days are peaceful. I feel useful and content. I have enough. There's no possible way I could get to where I am today from where I was without having a disease that was going to kill me if I didn’t treat it spiritually.