Only God

My vision for 2017 is the same as it has been for many years -- to continue to grow along spiritual lines through the program of Alcoholics Anonymous. I desire to come into a relationship with the God of my own misunderstanding that is so intimate it might be said that God and I are One. Since this is already a fact, there is nothing further for God to do. God’s work is done. Creation is finished. If our partnership is going to flourish this year -- if I really want more harmony, peace and order in my life -- it is up to me to take the actions to align my will with God’s will. I must show up in the present moment, tune into the intuitive messages, and follow the guidance by doing the next indicated thing.

Ego stands in direct opposition to this simple and effective way to live a God-centered life. Ego wants no part of God. Ego wants me to believe that I alone caused the peace, abundance and joy in my life. After all, I’m the one who goes to all the AA meetings; puts my hand out to newcomers; and picks up the phone to share my ESH. According to ego, I’m the one who should pay for all my mistakes with a sense of guilt and self-loathing. Ego even shows up disguised as spirituality to convince me I don’t need God. God is for suckers. I’m really OK, just the way I am. Really.

Ego is not a bad thing, it’s just not a true thing. It is simply a collection of old false ideas born of self-centered fear. Like my alcoholism, it’s not my fault I am holding these fearful ideas. Some fears came through my DNA as a way to avoid being eaten by saber tooth tigers and stomped on by wooly mammoths. Others came from well-meaning but ignorant parents, teachers, priests and society. Because these ideas came from adults, I naively formed beliefs around them. It is these beliefs -- these old ideas -- that block me from a complete realization of God. So my work again this year is to continuously look within and see what's true for me. The Twelve Steps help me with this process.

I’m learning there is no God and ____. There is only God. There’s no God and me. I am just a channel for God's expression.  In the other big book it says “of myself I am nothing, God does the work.” I am closer to this realization than ever before. I’m excited about growing my relationship with God this coming year. I’m glad to be on this path with you.