Ego stands in direct opposition to this simple and effective way to live a God-centered life. Ego wants no part of God. Ego wants me to believe that I alone caused the peace, abundance and joy in my life. After all, I’m the one who goes to all the AA meetings; puts my hand out to newcomers; and picks up the phone to share my ESH. According to ego, I’m the one who should pay for all my mistakes with a sense of guilt and self-loathing. Ego even shows up disguised as spirituality to convince me I don’t need God. God is for suckers. I’m really OK, just the way I am. Really.
Ego is not a bad thing, it’s just not a true thing. It is simply a collection of old false ideas born of self-centered fear. Like my alcoholism, it’s not my fault I am holding these fearful ideas. Some fears came through my DNA as a way to avoid being eaten by saber tooth tigers and stomped on by wooly mammoths. Others came from well-meaning but ignorant parents, teachers, priests and society. Because these ideas came from adults, I naively formed beliefs around them. It is these beliefs -- these old ideas -- that block me from a complete realization of God. So my work again this year is to continuously look within and see what's true for me. The Twelve Steps help me with this process.
I’m learning there is no God and ____. There is only God. There’s no God and me. I am just a channel for God's expression. In the other big book it says “of myself I am nothing, God does the work.” I am closer to this realization than ever before. I’m excited about growing my relationship with God this coming year. I’m glad to be on this path with you.