I consider my alcoholism to be a blessing. It sounds funny to say that, but I don't know how I could have traveled from where I was to where I am today without having this life threatening disease that was going to kill me unless I treated it spiritually. I was too committed to my own ideas, my own grand plans and schemes. It was only because I had no other choice. God made it baby simple for me: change or die.
I do not regret the past. I had to drink every drink, tell every lie, and endure every humiliating experience to find my bottom. One less of anything and I might have missed grace, that moment when it was clear that there was a softer, easier way through life than the way I was going. Back then I wasn't thinking about the promise of a better life, I only wanted the pain to go away -- the pain of frustration and confusion, the pain of resentment, the pain of self-hate, the pain of isolation. Today I spend very little time in fear, anger, or guilt. Like our book says, I enjoy a new freedom and a new happiness.
I am no longer baffled when a painful situation arises. Today when I lose my peace I know it is because I am trying to impose my self-centered version of reality on life instead of accepting Life exactly as it is. Pain must result whenever I cannot accept a person or circumstance in my life because, in essence, I am rejecting God's plan. I am forgetting that life is unfolding exactly as it supposed to and each of us is in exactly the right place for our highest and best good. If life were supposed to be any different than it is, it would be.