At every moment of the day I stand at a "Y" in the road. One road leads away from a drink, one road leads closer to one. When I'm spiritually fit, I tend to choose the path leading away from the drink. I am more focused on connecting with others rather than achieving more stuff for myself; I'm better able to overlook the differences between us and see similarities; Peace of mind is my number one goal.
If I get loaded down with fear and doubt I choose what appears to be the easier softer way. Comfort becomes my number one goal. As I move toward the drink, I struggle to be special and unique; I believe the noise in my head is truth; I complain, criticize and condemn. Sooner or later my program becomes stale. I get restless irritable and discontented. I may not drink, but life begins to lose its luster. I know what dragging myself through life like a zombie feels like. I don't want to go back there.
So the challenge for me is to keep it green. I've found that annual retreats, going to different meetings, performing annual house cleanings, and developing new friendships within the fellowship all help to keep my program fresh and growing. But sponsorship is still the most valuable component. There is no bigger thrill for me than seeing a human shipwreck turn his or her life around and sail proudly out of the AA harbor. Playing a small part in this miracle is simply the best way to live.