Peculiar Mental Twists
The BB says "bottles were only a symbol." I didn't become an alcoholic because I drank too much booze, I drank because I have a disease that manifests in "peculiar metal twists." This "stinking thinking" caused (causes) me emotional, spiritual and physical pain. Drinking was my solution to escape the pain. And it worked for a while until it got to the point that once I started I couldn't stop.
When I was new and people talked about things like Steps and carrying the message and Traditions, I really didn't really connect. But when you people talked about feelings of inadequacy, confusion, resentment and anger, frustration, fear and emptiness (oh yes, emptiness). I immediately identified. Only then could I listen for the solution.
These "peculiar mental twists" caused me much pain when I was growing up and still do today, but I have no regrets. I firmly believe that God made me an alcoholic so I could find my way back to Him through Alcoholics Anonymous.