Reminders of Recovery

My anniversary chip is the shiniest thing in my pocket. But the most vivid reminders during moments when I catch myself feeling comfortable in my own skin -- when I compare what it was like then to what it’s like today.

Today I experience moments of happiness for no reason. Adrenaline pumping excitement is no longer necessary for me to feel like I am alive. I don't seem to struggle to win attention and approval. It might be that I'm just getting older, but concern about what other people think about me is diminishing. I seemed to have miraculously recovered from a severe case of terminal seriousness. I somehow have begun to see that we are all just two bit comedians in a third rate play. I laugh more. I am no longer deeply concerned with how the movie of my life turns out. After cringing and wincing at myself for for the better part of 50 years, I have finally concluded that my movie has very little entertainment value. I am no longer obsessed with the way it turns out. I read "when the shoe fits, the foot is forgotten." Today I fit better in my own skin than ever before. Walking through life no longer gives me blisters.

These reminders help me realize that I’m being restored to my natural state of being. I am closer to being the person I was intended to be than ever before.